This hilarious parody somehow translates everything Diablo 3 represents into one smoking hot, enticing woman. But unfortunately for this guy the girl shares more traits with Diablo 3 than he probably would of liked.
Just a helpful hint for you to properly understand this video; for the first couple days of Diablo 3′s release a lot of gamers couldn’t even play single player, due to the huge server load (Error 37) a huge portion of players were obviously very upset that they couldn’t play the game they purchased due to Blizzard essentially adding always-online DRM to Diablo 3.
Recently we featured a hilarious musical satire about a girlfriend who’s being neglected due to her boyfriends Diablo 3 obsession, and as funny as that was, this is (most likely) a very real issue for many loved ones living with a Diablo 3 addict.
And that’s why french sex shop Absoloo is joining in on the fun, and chucking a heaping helping of potentially constructive humor at the issue, by giving anyone feeling abandoned due to a lovers lost interest because of Diablo 3, a free small vibrator.
Absoloo said this on their official blog (translated):
“He’s magic!” “No, the guards are just morons”
Saying the AI in Assassins Creed is stupid is sorta an understatement, sure social stealth works in some cases, but when a group is chasing you, and you sit on a bench no one’s going to run right past you, especially if you’re sticking out like a sore thumb by being the only dude in a long feature obscuring white robe.
In this hilarious spoof HISHE points out nearly everything wrong with Assassins Creeds AI in moments before logically concluding how the game should have ended.
170 kill streak? Nothin’ suspicious bout that
20 year old Englishman Lewys Martin earned thousands of pounds off a website he created to distribute hacks, and exploits for Call Of Duty, and that money wasn’t earned through advertisements, but rather via electronic theft.
Diablo 3 does not have a secret cow level (the title is a bald-faced lie) however, Diablo 3 does have a secret level that serves as the spiritual sequel to the secret cow level.
But first some background, when Diablo 3′s gameplay footage was first revealed, many fans were distraught upon viewing the games bright vivid colors, which looked more akin to World of Warcraft, than any previous Diablo; exaggeration ensued as it usually does, leading many fans, and critics alike to relating Diablo 3′s aesthetic to: Rainbows, sunshine, and unicorns. In response the Blizzard team working on Diablo 3 wore shirts sporting the design above to Blizzcon in possibly the greatest form of professional counter-trolling ever conducted.
Present day, Diablo 3 is out; and the obligatory “secret cow level” is called “Whimyshire” it’s a beautiful, bright magical land inhabited by Unicorns, teddy bears, sunshine, and enough gleeful happiness to cause cancer.
Continue reading for video footage of Diablo 3′s take on the secret cow level ‘Whimyshire’ and instructions to open the portal to this magical cancer inflicting world.
“How do you know so much computer jargon, but not know you can’t put a computer in a bag of ice?!”
Ever since Steam made PC gaming…relevant again, PC gamers have been touting the benefit of their higher end platform in console gamers faces, often equating Ps3, or Xbox 360 players to a lower more casual breed of gamer (not unlike the way we all JUSTIFIABLY mock Facebook/Smart Phone gaming)
But of course there’s pros, and cons to whichever avenue of gaming you spend your hard earned cash on. PC gaming may have better graphics, and modding, but it’s more expensive to set up a powerful rig, and PC gamers don’t have access to the diverse umbrella of Playstation exclusive games the Ps3 enjoys (same would go for Wii, as Nintendo has an almost equally powerful list of developers under its all encompassing Nintendo brand, but Wii is easy to emulate on the PC, and Xbox 360 isn’t worth mentioning as it has few exclusives, and many of those ‘exclusives’ are on PC)
In this funny over the top satire about the division between PC, and console gamers we see a group of friends not so tragically torn apart by the PC menace.
Also the video gets +1 from me for using Disturbed’s “Down With The Sickness” twice briefly.
Free DLC is always such a great good will gesture on behalf of developers towards their legions of fans, and it often helps push gamers into eventually buying the inevitable paid DLC.
Such is the case with Max Payne 3, as Rockstar has released the “Gorilla Warfare Pack” on PSN, and XBL for free. The pack contains 3 multiplayer items:
- Gorilla Mask: Gives you a boost of extra adrenaline for melee kills from behind.
- Lucky Coin: Gives you extra cash when looting bodies.
- Booby Trap: Makes your corpse explode if another player tries to loot it.
The Gorilla Warfare pack is available now, for the Ps3, Xbox 360, and will be made available upon arrival of Max Payne’s PC release on May 29th
There’s a reason why I’m not playing Diablo 3, it’s the same factor that keeps me away from the rapidly released annual story based Assassins Creed series, and largely why I didn’t touch the deep RPG experience that is Mass Effect until I found the second two titles for cheap.
I used to play Diablo 2 when I was younger, great game; but also one of the biggest time sinks you can have the
misfortune of stepping into, and although fun when you have the time, a game like that just places a ton of pressure on any, and every other aspect of your life, by demanding your attention through mentally addictive character progression.
But all seriousness aside, this parody is hilarious, and really catchy; gotta love hearing the girlfriend rap back about how much of a loser the boyfriend is: “Playing games, and wacking off is all you ever do” Also remember to bookmark this video…just to show it to your girlfriend if she starts bitching about your (hopefully moderated to some degree) gaming habits.
Max Payne 3 Review Courtesies Of Gamespot
Happy MAX PAYNE 3 Day To All
So it has finally arrived over eleven years from Max Payne 2, but it has come, Hell has frozen over. Most of our readers have probably never played Max Payne 1 or 2 and if you’re amongst them then it’s tea bag time for you. However, if you’re a more
mature seasoned gamer, then you have not only played the shit out of Max Payne 1 and 2, you have probably called in sick today to play Max Payne 3, “I’m in bed with a nasty clown,” or in our case “I’m in bed dick up to my eyes.” okay, okay, I know I’m no comedian but hey everyone nowadays gets an A+ just for showing up. I thought long and hard about a Max Payne 3 review and even my own personal FUG video review which we have never done. But 3 beers later and 1 hour into the Max Payne 3, I figured I could just repost the excellent gamespot video review and get myself back to the game. So if you’re reading this looking for a review of some sort, then here is a brief review……. Why the fuck are you reading this? The title of the game is MAX PAYNE 3 , are you a retarded Wal-Mart employee? Get your ass off the couch and buy this game NOW maggots
Every major character in Mass Effect 3 has a certain style, and personality to them, and apparently that individuality is 100% transferable to all sorts of different mixed drinks, and shots to help knock you off your galactic asses.
The cool thing is there’s a drink in here for basically any, and every person, I found several drink/squad mate combinations I liked, and would definitely down in real life. Hell, even my two favorite squad mates from Mass Effect 2 (Kasumi, Grunt) are represented well here.
Check out the full list of Mass Effect Squad drinks here.