Tag Archives: boobs

Sexy DS?

Yea, Sexy DS… Who knew? Bellow I have rounded up several games that are quite… racy. You will notice that I have excluded NDS Homebrews. Homebrews are games made by fans and are for hacked systems. Those do not interest me as they have very little reputability or merit to back them up. Since they are home made, they do not adhere to any restrictions and can be downright pornographic. There isn’t anything wrong with porn, but homebrews are dangerous. They can fucking seize up your device. With that said, here are some REAL sexy DS Games.

 

Doki Doki Majo Shinpan!

Now you too can naughty-touch schoolgirls without the prison time!

This gives a whole new meaning to “tap that ass”

 

To LOVE ru DS

A game about smacking ass… At least this one has 3D models.

Don’t ask me what that penguin dildo is doing there… I don’t know.

 

Dual Love

Man lovin’ for all you girls into porn/men into boys.

 

Super Robot Taisen og Saga Endless Frontier Exceed

Apparently the heroine shows a lot of ass… reminds me of Beyonetta.

What is this, I don’t even…

 

 

As you may have guessed, most of these are imports. If this little research escapade has tought me one thing, its that the CERO’s approach to rating can’t be trusted in Western society…


The Witcher 2 Draws Near

If you aren’t excited about the Witcher 2, you either didn’t play Witcher 1, or don’t like RPG’s. Either way, I’m about to excite you (or arouse you). The first Witcher game was made in 2007 and for its time and budget, it was spectacular. The biggest asset to the game was the Multiple sex scenes. In fact, a big portion of the game was conquesting over 18 different women to make the sexy to. The drawback was that really all you got was audio, a blurry background of supposed fucking, and a card with your new ‘score’ on it.

You should be looking forward to the new Witcher because moral fiber has degraded since then, and graphic quality an processing has improved. Expect gratuitous procreation.

LOOKAT EM JUUUGS!

Witcher 2 comes out May 17, 2011 available through digital outlets such as Steam.


5 Best In Game Bangs

So I been doing a bit of research (for the blog… not my personal entertainment…) and I have found what I believe are the 5 best video game sex scenes of all time! I even went and found you all YOUTUBE VIDS! Now keep in mind that these scenes are from un-modded games. That means (with the exception of one) that the DEVS put this shit in here. Also keep in mind that all of these games are REAL games, not crazy Japanese imports. These are games that you can go to Walmart and buy (maybe not now though because some are quite old)

WARNING! If you object to digital re-enactments of sex, don’t watch these videos.

#5 LBP (2008)

#4 Mass Effect 2 (2010)

#3 GTA Gay Tony (2010)

#2 Indigo Prophecy (2005)

#1 Phantasmagoria (1995)


FU Radar: No More Heroes HD

Its actually called No More Heroes: Heroes Paradise, but thats rather long for a blog intro.

Have you heard about the only REAL fucked up game exclusively for the Wii? Its called No More Heroes and No More Heroes 2. Whats that? Its newest sequal will be exclusively for the PS3? OH SNAP, sorry Wii, you do suck.

ANYWAY, No More Heroes is a game about a light catana wielding otaku who manages to not suck long enough to make something of his life by becoming a top assassin. This game looks like good fun with its cel-shaded graphics, salty dialogue, bloody action, and tits. I am looking forward to this game on the ps3… provided it comes with chocolate and for half price.

I am tired of typing so read more here if you care:   http://ps3.ign.com/articles/113/1130567p1.html

That about says it all


FU Crystal Ball: Knights Contract

This quasi-historic beat-em-up brawler stars a knight cursed with immortality who wants to die. He is not invulnerable however, he just regenerates rapidly. At parts, your character is diced up into little cubes, dissembled and torn to limb from limb. So there will be blood… Lots of it. However, the demon enemies you hack to fucking bits… they don’t regenerate. How do you lose if you can’t die? Well you have a girl to look after, how else? At least she’s sexy lookin. This game has potential to be pretty sick. Its one to watch.

 

Wtf is THAT?


Bulletstorm

Bulletstorm (PS3, Xbox, PC)     Studio: Epic Games     Size: Full (about 15 gigs)     Release: Feb 22, 2011

The PSN bequeathed unto me a magical token of love this last Tuesday. The Bulletstorm demo was released! TWAS EPICAL! HUZZAH!

This is THE most adult game released in recent months. This game is visceral, gory, bloody, obscene, and sexy! You play through the demo with 2 other NPC’s, one is a hot babe. I can only imagine where that leads. Anyway, the dialogue had me rolling around in fits of laughter. I mean, its soooo irreverent. At the end the main character calls you “dick-tits”. Bulletstorm is the pulp-scifi game I have been craving. It has HUGE guns, aliens, fucking MAD graphics and immortally fun game play mechanics. This really is the love child of Unreal Tournament and Borderlans in so many ways. CAN YOU TELL I’M STOKED FOR THE FULL GAME!?

So the game play is like this: you have fucking huge guns that shoot all kinds of mad projectiles. From the demo, my favorite was the exploding bolo launcher. Bulletstorm has mele assets thrown in (like the slide kick and the punt kick) that varies the combat up a little. The most unique thing though is your tether. It allows you to pitch enemies into the air, yank them towards you, and activate environmental traps. This game encourages original and combo kills. the more smooth and complex the kill, the more points. The more points you have, the sexier you will become! Ok so you don’t get sexier, but you do get bragging rites. At the end of the demo, we are promised online competitive and co-op modes as well as a story for the story mode! How novel. But really, who cares about the story? This is a gore-junkie game!

IRREVERANCE HO!

Bones, bones, bones

Price: $60

Demo: Yes for PS3 and Xbox 360

Fucked-0-meter:     [********__]     8/10

Final Verdict: An incredibly funny, innovative, attractive, irreverent, and enjoyable game. I will be first in line to purchase this on the 22nd. I advise you find your own lines to be at the front of because THIS GAME IS THE SHIT!


All hail the Duke

Well I’ll be a horses penis, Duke Nukem really IS coming back! Now this isnt what I would call ‘breaking’ news as it has been known for several months, but its still new to some people. It deeply saddens me when I talk to people about video games, and they say “Duke who?” Well in this article you will learn everything you need to know about the Duke AND his balls of steel!

It all started with the self titled side scroller in 1991. Since then, Duke has been the hero in over a dozen games: the most famous to date being Duke Nukem 3D. It featured incredible dialogue (to hear some of the best, go here and poke around: http://www.soundboard.com/sb/solrosin.aspx), insane graphics, unbelievably deep story, and strippers! Ok some of that may have been fabricated or over exaggerated… but there were strippers! After that, things went down hill for our hero. His contract expired, he gained wait, and the people of the world forgot there once great hero. This comic strip by Penny Arcade sums up the general sentiment then and now:

Horse WHA?

NOW, 14 years later, the prince of awesome RETURNS IN (drum-roll please)

Duke Nukem Forever!!!

WATCH THE FUCKING TRAILER

Now if you want more of a game review, you should watch this video here, it explains the game in perfect detail.

Zero Punctuation: Viewer’s Choice: Duke Nukem Forever

Long live the king, baby.


The Void

The Void (PC)     Studio: Ice-Pick Lodge     Full (Download Only): 6 gigs     Release: Q4 2009

BOOBS…

Bet that got your attention

Welcome to the void: the space between life and death. where the only thing you need to survive is… Color? Yes, color. This game is a roller-coater of beautiful graphics and psychological mind-benders. The game is littered with bizarre ideas and concepts that will keep your fingers busy… scratching your head that is.

first off let me say that I like this game. I truly respect indie developers. This is a stunning example if Indie… or maybe more of a perfect stereotype: pushing the envelope but failing at it. I played through maybe the third level of this game and for the life of me, I had no idea what I was doing. You may be asking yourself “what spurred you on through this nonsensical-nes?” Well it can be summed up in 2 words. Graphic nudity. Boobs everywhere. the first person you meet gets nekkid before the second level begins! Unfortunately (or fortunately if you swing that way) the same goes for your character… who is a man. PENIS! It kinda freaked me out at first because it was completely unexpected.

Anyway, I would have kept playing this game to the end, but I lost on the third level. Normally that isn’t a big deal in a game… but for this one, it was enough to make me jump ship. I can attribute the progress I did achieve to one thing. Blind luck. I would call The Void a puzzle game but I don’t think it was intended to be one. I just think the ‘color life support’ system that the developers tried to incorporate was so horribly convoluted that it was what doomed the game. I’m serious. It’s that bad. Its like this. Pretend you have a horrible disease. Your doctor (Dr Manhattan)  tells you what you need to do to stay alive and leaves you with a couple of bottles of medicine and a crazy looking lab machine. You then have to mix your own medicine with UNLABELED bottles and take the medicine in the right doses… Oh wait I forgot to say that the doctor speaks polish and you don’t. The game is in English but they might as well pantomime the instructions to you.

If you REALLY need some digital tits, this is a pretty good game for it, provided you can learn how to play it… but if you are willing to do that, you might as well learn quantum physics. It would benefit you more and aggravate you less.

Look at them purdee graphics

Told you there were boobs

Price: $10 on Steam

Demo: none

Site: No game site OR developer site, but here is the Steam page http://store.steampowered.com/app/37000/

Fucked-o-Meter: |******____|     6/10

Final Verdict: The Void is sure to turn heads if you play it where people can see. Its beautiful, and boob-filled, but it isn’t worth the learning curve.


Top 25 sexiest female fighters.

Here’s your dose of digital T/A for the day. UGO’s got up a list of their 25 sexiest female fighting game characters.

My favorites from their list? Sonya, Psylocke, and whoever the hell #10 is (I didn’t need to see a name, the nice body, blonde hair, and black leather was enough for me)

You can check out their list here. Who’s your favorite characters from this list?


Custers Revenge

Custer’s Revenge (Ateri 2600)     Studio: Mystique     Size: A few Kb/full for Atari     Release: 1982

Now, you should know first that this is a little off-color for us here at FUGames to post anything worse than M rated reviews. However this is just to bizarre that I made an exception because the graphics make it funny as opposed to pornographic. Additionally, If you like this sort of…. thing…. you can read more about old sex games here: http://www.seanbaby.com/nes/nes/naughty.htm Though you should be warned… Sean isnt as candid as we are   =D

I just wanted to drop this here and give you all something to laugh/rage about. Apparently there was a thriving sex game market for the Atari…. Who knew? Well this one is the most bizarre. You play as General custard who has to run over to an naked Indian girl who is tied to a cactus…. and do her…. all while avoiding falling arrows.

Yeah…. so sory for ruining your day, but sence its already in the toilet…. HERE ARE SOME PICS!

FUGames

FUGames

Price: Priceless

Demo: FFFFFFYEA RIGHT ITS 20 YEARS OLD AND CAN BE FULLY PLAYED IN 20 SECONDS. lol

Fucked-O-Meter: Then=10/10     Now=3/10

Verdict: PLEASE don’t play this. It sucked when it came out in 1982. It still sucks now.


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